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Letter of Recommendation: Kabir Singh

By Sachin Gautam


What do you love about me, Kabir?I love the way you breathe…”

Kiara (Character, Kabir Singh) "

When you are deeply in love and deeply connected to a woman (and vice versa); if you don't have the liberty of slapping each other, then I don't see anything there.”

- Sandeep Reddy Vanga


“‘Kabir Singh’ and ‘Arjun Reddy’ are not the only films glorifying misogyny; there are several others too but not to this extent. That is one of the reasons why I do the kind of films I do. There should be a counter-narrative too. I know I’ll never be able to match up to the numbers of this film but that won’t deter me. We are on the cusp of change and I am not going to give up now.”

– Taapsee Pannu

Kabir Singh is a story which acts as a mirror of today’s misogynistic, toxic and patriarchal society where love and anger are depicted in their most dangerous forms. Many argue that the film glorifies misogyny, with the male lead character slapping the female lead, and objectifying women. However, one can also argue that the punishment Kabir had to face was severe, with his anger leading him into a pit of loneliness which triggered him into alcoholism, womanising and angry rebellion.


As the movie continues, the character is seen dissolving as his facade fades and we witness the real pain in his life, a pain that drove Kabir into a maze where the only intoxication satisfied him. Therefore, the movie successfully portrays typical Indian societies and colleges and very subtly reflects the Indian youth.


The thing is that Indian cinema has always been a treasure trove of toxic masculinity. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t great films told from other perspectives, but it is undeniable that there are still too many cinematic works that glorify stalking, make light of rape (and its victims) and depict violence in extremely nonchalant ways.


And if you, like me, have grown up on a diet of ’90s Tamil cinema, you might even believe that every romantic relationship is built on the foundation of at least one solid slap. Even a film as recent as Saamy 2 shows a man slapping a woman to “put her in her place” and “shape her into the kind of woman they would want to be with.” Watching those movies, it would be very easy to think that slaps are actually a sign of love, or at least, a necessary prerequisite. As for those who might say, “This is just a movie and not a prescription to young men,” I have this to independently with a child in her. She grows to be a strong, tough-willed woman while she is also going through the break-up.


The love along with the journey of the breakup transformed the two despicable characters into characters we liked. The movie is about this very transformation. Their love for each other changes them to become better versions of themselves. That is what Kabir Singh is all about.


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